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Control Your Thoughts Or Your Thoughts Will Control You

by Bruno Deshayes on 27 Apr 2017 permalink
Do you feel you have invested a good chunk of your life into someone else and now it has all been trashed?

Are you being drawn to appropriate blame on something that happened in the past?

Bad things happen to good people for no fault of their own - this is life - welcome to the real world!

The issue is not what happened - you cannot change it. The issue is - how are you going to move from here?

The short and sweet answer to it all is this - GET OVER IT! Some of you may not yet be ready to hear it but the sooner you are able to close the door on the past and rebuild your future from where you are now in the present - the better off you will be.

How does controlling your thoughts can help? The battle is in the mind. The self-talk that goes on in your head is something you can address.

There is something in us that cries out for justice when we have been wronged. There are also scores of people around the world who are worse off than you and yet do not complain. What is their secret? They have learned to let go of unnecessary emotional baggage. Are you travelling lightly or are you burdened with remorse and bitterness? If so it can become a mental cancer that will eat you up if you let it get hold of you. There is indeed a time to mourn the loss of a relationship, the loss of an opportunity, the loss of a whole section of your life that has apparently gone to waste.

But there is also a time to move on. Only you can decide when and how to do that. Maybe moving to a different town will give you a change of scenery. Although be mindful of not cutting whatever emotional support you have left.

A good mental discipline is to say "I will not go there!" when you are being drawn to reminisce about the same old scenario. This can happen first thing in the morning when you wake up or when you are idle sitting in public transport. Catch it in its tracks - snap out of it - this thing is trying to own you.

The flip side of all of this is that there are valuable lessons in life that you can only learn through overcoming adversity. Did you hear me? You have been chosen worthy to go through your experience because you will come out stronger and more mature out of it. Welcome to the club of the braves.

It's not what happened to me that matters; it's how I handle it!

Fernando Gallegos says:
Thanks Bruno. Truly inspiring and motivating. Ever thought of presenting your philosophies to an audience? Seriously!

Linda Brooks says:
Lighthouses are never built in safe places. So if all you see around you are rocks and shipwrecks, maybe you have been given the privilege of being a lighthouse. In spite of the dark solitary shadows of night, your place in life has a reason.

Adrian McCabe says:
Great article Bruno. Keep up the good work! God bless.

Neuro-linguistic programming exposed

by Bruno Deshayes on 06 Oct 2016 permalink
Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) is a cover-up for self-hypnosis and should be exposed for what it is.

Hypnosis has been used as a method of mental, emotional, behavioural, and physical healing for hundreds and even thousands of years.Witchdoctors, Sufi practitioners, shamans, Hindus, Buddhists, and yogis have practiced hypnosis, and now medical doctors, dentists, psychotherapists, and others have joined them. From witchdoctors to medical doctors and from past to present, the rituals and results have been reproduced, revised, and repeated. The hypnotic trance begins by focusing a person's attention and produces many results. According to its advocates, the practice of hypnotism may alter behaviour in such a way as to change habits; stimulate the mind to recall forgotten events and information; enable a person to overcome shyness, fears, and depression; cure maladies such as asthma and hay fever; improve a person's sex life; and remove pain.

Self-hypnosis abounds in rock music, self-help tapes and other "claim it and you have it" business motivation trainings. Some life-coach practitioners peddle the method under various guises to cultivate a captive market. As a consumer you know how to start but you are in the dark as to when and how it is going to end.

Psychology Today published an article titled "Hypnosis may be hazardous," which says: A teenage girl with no history of psychological problems was hypnotized on stage as part of a show. Soon after leaving with her friends, she apparently re-entered the trance. No one could rouse her. She had to be hospitalized and fed intravenously, and took months to recover. (source hypnosis ebook)

We live in a spiritual world whether you acknowledge it or not. If you seek after some magic powers you may get some early results but at what price?

What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? These are the words of Jesus Christ recorded in the gospel of Mark (8:36 NIV). Obviously if you are reading this you may have kept the best for last. Do yourself a favour - don't settle for substitutes - go for the real thing. Check out Witness 4 Christ.

Life with the Poatinians

by Bruno Deshayes on 22 Sep 2016 permalink

Poatina, 70km from Launceston, Tasmania was built in the 1960's to house the labour force building the hydro electric scheme of the Great Lake. With the advent of automation the hydro power station is now monitored remotely from Hobart and only a skeleton staff remains on site. The Fusion Christian organisation was able to buy the whole village complete with a general store, a motel, a service station, primary and secondary schools, an oval, a golf course, a swimming pool and a community hall.

Poatina is the hub of Fusion with regular seminars, a radio station, TAFE accredited social work courses and an office overseeing missions overseas. Poatina is run as a strata title rather than being an open real-estate market. Bar a few, all the people here are involved with Fusion. The organisation had a major setback in 2009 when its charismatic leader Mal Garvin fell from grace in a case of sexual indiscretion with a young woman he was ministering to. He admitted his guilt and resigned. Three years on, the organisation changed its structure with a CEO and a board of directors. Poatina is searching for a new identity. Some key people left either to the overseas mission field or out of a sense of betrayal.

There are 2 new buildings in the town. A new library for the school and an aircraft hangar acquired and erected to house a new tourist attraction: a glass blowing studio.

There is no courthouse, no lawyer, no constable, no pub, no liquor outlet, no drugs. The only offenders are the large possums who turn you garbage bin upside down during the night and pooh everywhere on the lawns. A fly invades your house the moment you leave your door ajar but they don't bother you when you are outside. The weather can change in an instant. You may head off with T-shirt and thongs and a sun hat and return drenched and shivering after a howling wind dumps a surprise shower.

I arrived in early January 2012 as a volunteer and helped as a kitchen hand during the 'Faith And The Arts Festival'. Even the simplest things require you to use your brains as I found out when my task was to peel the shell of some 100 hard boiled eggs. After 20 eggs the skin of my left thumb was red and sore. I developed a technique to roll the egg on the table bench to make many small cracks along the middle and then peeling the egg under water like an orange.

My task is to come up with ways to put the Poatina Chalet Motel and Restaurant back on the tourist map. I took photos of all the rooms and cabins and uploaded them onto a booking website

This week I served fuel at the service station which doubles as a bank since it is the only place in town with an ATM. There again I was on my own fumbling on how to replace the roll of paper so that we could continue issuing receipts. There is no longer a mechanic on duty. But he suddenly appeared back from Canberra with his wife who teaches at the next conference. He was quick to reopen the work bay and hoisted on the lift a 'Thomas Tank Engine' with a petrol engine. It was to be maintained for the Australia Day parade and is featured on the Google Maps Street View. I hardly have time to scratch myself but I managed to do some sightseeing last Saturday and visit a church in Launceston on Sunday.

The dining room looks more like a canteen than a restaurant and passing tourists would be forgiven to think they landed in the midst of some grand church retreat. The people you meet are affable and easy to talk to. Most of them are from an open brethren, church of Christ, evangelical background but I also found an ex Christian Outreach Centre pastor from Western Australia.

Well, time to sign off now as I am heading for the Foundation Course - the one week long intensive Fusion discipleship program.

But further down the track, this is my more sedate assessment:

I set myself a period of 3 months to achieve something in Poatina and now time is up.

The moment I arrived here I had an unease about the place. The neglect and poor maintenance of the buildings and facilities was a telling sign of a deeper problem. Poatina is at a crossroad. It will continue to die its slow and painful natural death as a rehabilitation colony and arts centre or it will be hit by a sovereign move of God in a way that only the Lord will get the glory.

The most lacking thing in this place is a good cash cow business to allow people to make a few quids for themselves. How can you be a blessing to others if you are not blessed yourself? But Poatina lacks an enterprising spirit. Sure Tasmania is the worst Australian state for unemployment. There is a brain drain of the local youth migrating to the continent for a brighter future. Poatina is very good at one thing: applying for all sorts of government grants. But it has two drawbacks: it creates a welfare mentality and if you feed off the hand of some government department you run the risk of getting your funding cut-off at the next election.

You can't fix people who do not want your help. Half of Poatina's problems are of her own making. You cannot distinguish Fusion from Poatina. Fusion is the Christian organisation who bought for a song the Poatina village in the 1990s from Tasmanian Hydro Electricity. They setup their own body corporate with its own by-laws making the place a drugs and alcohol free zone. That was perfect in the heydays of Fusion charismatic leader Mal Garvin. Today it is a sting in the tail. People cannot buy or sell property here as it is a closed market where newcomers are subject to screening and the motel cannot serve you wine with your meal. You are not permitted to bring your own either. This makes it difficult to promote the motel as a tourism stop for fly-fishing. Instead of handling things over to the local council the body corporate has to take care of running its own sewerage treatment plant and garbage collection. That was manageable with a population of 350 residents. Now being down to less than 100 it is pushing on the friendship with monthly working bees and rosters to keep the place alive. There is also an issue with most building having asbestos roofs and even asbestos wall lining.

Poatina is a Christian community by name only. Most people go off on Sundays to worship at the local churches in the towns nearby. The result is that there is no pastoral care, prayer group or bible study apart from the specific courses for those in rehabilitation. There is a notion that Fusion is not a church and should not conduct religious services in Poatina. This is the perfect strategy for the devil to cut down any spiritual life and growth in the place. Most Fusion people come from an evangelical background and have no concept of moving in the gifts of the Holy Spirit. There is no desire for divine healing. There is no notion of seeking God's face through corporate prayer and fasting. There is no inclination to prophesy the will of God into one's circumstances.

The best thing for young adults in the process of rebuilding their lives is to walk out of Poatina with a trade. In the past you could do a qualification as a mechanic or in hospitality. Today both the garage and the motel are loss making businesses artificially propped up by volunteer labour. Instead of a trade they are being trained as social workers - having to deal again with people from the toxic environment they escaped from. Not really a glowing future when you need some hope. The golf course has been leased to a nearby club and maybe this could be the solution for other things. If the Poatinians do not have the drive and the marketing skills to bring prosperity into town maybe selling off to another entity could bring some life back in the place.

There is a core group of die-hard Fusion folks who oppose any change hoping that the next round of funding will revive them. In the past many people came with their own trade and left without passing the baton to someone else to take over. Some are dreaming of the good olds days when Poatina had its own baker and its own butcher. Today the general store has stopped supplying fresh produce and is closed half of the time. With transport people are better off doing their shopping in Launceston.

This is the perfect setup for a revival don't you think? Jesus waited four days to attend to Lazarus to maximize the impact of raising someone from the dead. Poatina for all intends and purposes is - dare I say it - dead.

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." (2 Chr 7:14 NIV)

Paul Szilard says:
Thanks for the great newsletter. You really do have a 1st class writing style. I think you should compile some of your articles into a book. The description of your new environment is interesting, so keep doing further updates. Cheers, Paul Szilard

Terry Khor says:
What a beautiful and inspired place! I am so happy for you. I would like to live there myself! I can imagine myself spending the rest of my life there! I hope you find your happiness in this place, more importantly, find out God's will for your life, and live it to the full. God bless you!

Miriam Deshayes says:
I love it! Wow dad that sounds so interesting, its like a whole different world down there, what an adventure :) Glad to hear about your egg peeling skills ;)

Luke Reifler says:
Praise God for his leading and provision for you - physically and spiritually. God is good! It is so wonderful to hear how your piece of the puzzle fits into theirs so well. May every week challenge you to grow greater faith, greater love, greater passion and greater peace. DaySpring will miss you but Poatina will be blessed by your contribution. May heaven invade earth wherever you go.

Charlie Stantz says:
I wonder what Mal or Mat Garvin would say about this place now. From what I hear from a lot of people is that Fusion destroys more lives than they save. You cannot polish crap, it just does not work. I understand the die hard leftovers from the old days like to see Poatina continue however how much Gov funding does it take to keep an entity like this going. If it's on it's last legs then DO THE RIGHT THING. Pull the pin.

Sasha Man says:

Laugh on me

by Bruno Deshayes on 04 Aug 2016 permalink
What does the cannibal say after eating a clown? It tasted funny.

Mary took her pony to the vet. The animal is now in a stable condition.

Why couldn't the pony talk? He was a little horse.

What do cows read to their calves at night? Dairy tales.

What does the unloved pig say to the farmer? You take me for grunted.

Why don't anteaters get sick? They are full of anty-bodies.

What do you call two dinosaurs who pranged their cars? Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

What do you call cattle with a sense of humour? Laughing stock.

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They have experienced pain before and bought jewellery.

What's the difference between men and women? A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Judge: "Do you have anything to offer to this court before I pass sentence?"
Defendant: "No, your Honour, my lawyer took every penny!"

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, tree surgeons debarked, models deposed and dry-cleaners depressed?

An accountant suffering insomnia visits his doctor. "Have you tried counting sheep?" "I think that's the problem. I make a mistake then I spend three hours trying to fix it!"

"Doctor, I think I need glasses." "You certainly do, Sir. This is a fish and chips shop."

A woman bet her local butcher $50 that he couldn't reach the meat on the top shelf. "Nope" he said "the steaks are too high."

Employer: In this job we really need someone who is responsible.
Job applicant: I am definitely your man! In my last job every time something went wrong, they said I was responsible.

CEO at AGM: Ladies and gentlemen, last month we were teetering on the edge of a precipice. Today I am proud to announce we are going to take a great step forward.

A boss asks an employee if he believes in life after death. "Why do you want to know?" asks the employee. The boss replies: "Because while you said you were at your grandmother's funeral, she popped in to see you."

A woman got a job as a historian only to realise there was no future in it.

Boss: "I'm going to mix business with pleasure."
Employee: "What's that?"
Boss: "You're fired!"

Global obesity a threat to mankind

by Bruno Deshayes on 28 Jul 2016 permalink
The poorest countries are now seen as a free for all, last marketing frontier by the junk food multinational giants. Subsidised Coke and free chocolate samples are being pushed into every remote hamlet to enslave the natives to a diet their body cannot handle.

The cheap supply of cooking oil and sugar is causing an epidemic of diabetes in India. Schools in Mexico guzzle Coke because it is cheaper than installing water purification. Marketing consultants tour the Brazilian slums to peddle Nestle's snack foods. They even use showboats up the Amazon river to promote their appealing merchandise.

The Chinese are trampling their weight into fitness gyms in the hope of arresting the effects of their munch-on-the-go lifestyle. Fatness is everywhere. Gluttony is taking the world by stealth.

Never mind global warming, the economy, conflicting ideologies and other world issues - we are fattening ourselves to the hilt. The West has a big responsibility to show leadership and progress but it is failing badly. The illusion of self-correcting free markets has failed to deliver anything of substance. Instead it is creating a playground for powerful conglomerates to push their agenda of profit and market dominance on weak local governments. But they will be the ones to foot the medical bills which are ballooning like the waistline of their constituents.

It is worth noting that the food giants marketing tsunami is a repeat of the techniques so successfully used by the tobacco lobby in the past. Colourful packaging, toys and games are there to bribe the parents into feeding their young the junk they don't need.

Coke is half price in rural areas as opposed to the price in downtown Mexico City. Obviously you have to be first before Pepsi gets here - never mind if children get rotten teeth with all that lolly water in their baby bottle.

In Brazil, the turning point is the explosion of local supermarkets complete with barcodes and point-of-sale terminals at the expense of the town square where small farmers used to sell their local produce. Consumers are switching from a diet of fruits and vegetables to one of processed foods rich in starch, fat and sugar. They are lured into leaving their traditional lifestyle to embrace progress and convenience. Their metabolism doesn't seem to agree - not knowing what to do with all those extra calories. People realise that once you put on weight, it is awfully difficult to get rid of it. An obese mother walks her child to school, half an hour each way - without any result on her condition.

Chris Harvey says:
Your clearly think deeply about a range of things, but I'm finding your musings aren't doing anything to help me, so I will be dropping out from your mailing list.

Bruno says:
Sorry to see you go. I thought you would have much to contribute but time is the essence, I understand.

Tickle my funny bone

by Bruno Deshayes on 07 Jul 2016 permalink
An expert is someone who knows more and more about less and less until she knows absolutely everything about nothing...

The government promised me a stimulus package... instead I got a raft of measures.

A woman turned me down for a date... I had to explain I wanted to have dinner with her - not having her for dinner.

"My passport photo does not do me justice." "You don't need justice - you need mercy!"

French people do not like fast food. They eat snails instead.

"I can't find what's wrong with you - must be the drinking or something..." "I'm sorry to hear that doc, what about if I come back when you're sober?"

The drought forced a farmer to turn his field into an auto-parts junkyard. From that time on every year was a bumper crop.

What do you call a lump of metal, wiggling at the bottom of the sea? A nervous wreck.

If God is watching us... we'd better be entertaining...

If you're feeling unwanted or insignificant... try missing a couple of mortgage repayments.

I told my shrink I thought I was a dog At my next appointment he wouldn't let me up on the couch.

I never drink coffee at work I toss and turn at my desk all day.

A divorce lawyer put on his sign Satisfaction guaranteed or your honey back.

Marriage is the way to stop people fighting with strangers. Divorce is the way to get custody of your sanity.

I've been sacked from every job I've ever had At least you can't call me a quitter.

He's not a complete idiot ...some parts are missing.

I've got an inferiority complex. But I say it's not a very good one...

He never treats a woman like an object. But occasionally he treats an object like a woman.

The magic hasn't gone out of our marriage. He still disappears every few weeks...

Ours was a mixed marriage. She was perfect and I wasn't...

My ex-wife said she wanted to dance on my grave. So I arranged for a burial at sea.

She said she was sick of me. Undeterred I bought her a get well card.

She was so nervous on our blind date. When I picked her up she put the seatbelt around her knees.

I had a terrible nightmare. I dreamt I was eating a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone.

How good it is to do nothing when all else is busy around

by Bruno Deshayes on 07 Apr 2016 permalink
Being able to rest from your labour is a privilege few of us know how to enjoy in a world that wants more for less. You are not a machine. Unless you learn how to pace yourself you will burn - guaranteed!

There is a time to work and a time to rest. A time to concentrate and a time to unwind. A time to be creative and a time to relax.

What would be the motivation to get people to break that rule? Who said we had to obey rules? The common wisdom "do as you please as long as it doesn't harm anyone" is flawed.

Human beings work in cycles. We have a heartbeat. We need a regular sleep pattern. Even being deprived of sunlight is detrimental. The short answer is that we were made that way.

Learning to manage your time is a skill that is taught by frustration and disappointment. Something good can come out of a negative experience - as long as you have a teachable spirit. If you had it your way all the time you would become lazy and conceited. Not a pretty sight. Where you spend your time tells me all about your priorities in life. If you care for your family you will spend quality time to build them up. If work is your idol you will bow to a slave master that is never satisfied.

Why not be content with what you have now rather than trying to bite more than you can chew? And you know what? If you don't have the discipline to know when to stop someone else will pull the plug on you. It might be an accident, a mental breakdown, a relationship that ends up abruptly, a large customer taking their business elsewhere, etc...

The knowledge of the future does not belong to us. One thing we can control though is how we spend our time right now. Don't be burdened by past events. The past is gone. You can't go there and try to fix it. It is water under the bridge. Let go and move on. Forgive those who did you wrong. They might be oblivious to the hurt they caused you but by holding a grudge you're the one being bound - not them!

It is by abiding to your own rhythm that you can move forward. When you the least expect it, new ideas will spring to mind, why? Because the pressure is off and you are free again to be who you were meant to be...

Bad press for social media

by Bruno Deshayes on 18 Mar 2016 permalink
As social media comes of age we start to realise that we might be getting more than we bargained for. Or is it that it only takes a few to spoil a good thing for everyone else?

Project X revisited
This disgusting movie has inspired many attempts to recreate in real life mass parties of violence, drugs, sex and debauchery. The latest incident was in the Dutch town of Haren.

The police had been on high alert after a schoolgirl posted a message inviting friends to her 16th birthday party. She forgot to mark it as a private event, prompting more than 20,000 replies. She posted the invitation on Facebook and sent it to friends, who then sent it to other friends and soon it spread like wildfire across the Internet.

Several websites sprung up referring to the party as "Project X Haren", counting down the seconds to the event and claiming 150,000 people had been invited. It also published the party's address, adding: "By all means bring some friends!"

Previous Project X parties have run riot in different parts of the world including Germany, Australia and especially the United States, where teens wrecked an unoccupied Texas home, causing damage of up to $100,000.

Why not have a sequel to the movie this time replacing youth with elderly. Imagine invitations going viral on baby boomers chat rooms. They are all converging on a secret retirement home with their mopeds and wheelchairs. Any damage caused can be blamed on Alzheimer's disease.

Sport twitters
Australian athletes had been banned from using twitter while their team lost countless medals in a bout of despair. Football players had to deal with racial slurs when they disappointed their fans. Coaches are considering monitoring their team social media profiles to coerce members into towing the party line.

Cyber bullying
At school the offenders would use these tactics:

- Spread lies and rumours about the victim
- Trick the victim into revealing personal information
- Send or forward mean text messages
- Post pictures of victim without their consent
- Pretend they are several other people online also attacking the victim

At work harassment can be malicious false postings seeking to damage their victim's earnings, employment, reputation or safety. The question of liability for harassment and character assassination is particularly important for legislative protection. The original authors of the offending material are, more often than not, not only anonymous, but untraceable. Nevertheless, abuse should consistently be brought to company staffers' attention.

Identity theft
Recently LinkedIn had to confess many of their user accounts had been compromised and asked people to change their passwords. It is not just the LinkedIn account that was at stake - people tend to use the same password over and over. All the hackers have to do is try the same email and password combination to break into your facebook, twitter and whatever accounts you might be holding online.

Does that put you off social media? Do you still believe marketing experts claiming that you need to cultivate your brand on as many channels as possible? I would welcome your comments.

anonymous says:
On the other hand the social buzz about Jill Meagher mobilized a crowd and helped speed up the police investigation.

Loving my enemies up close

by Bruno Deshayes on 17 Mar 2016 permalink
I thought I was doing fine loving my enemies from a distance. Then it occurred to me I had also to love them up close as well.

I had forgiven my ex-wife for breaking her marriage vows and I assumed the matter was closed and it was all water under the bridge. Well not quite. The litmus test was when I was asked to perform my father's duties at my daughter's wedding. I declined with the lame excuse that it would be a parody of the institution of marriage. To witness my daughter's vows with the presence of the one who broke her marriage vows with me and had replaced me with another man even though I am still alive was more than I could bear.

This was all playing in my mind six months before the due date. All sorts of emotions battled in my head so much so that I could not put the matter to rest.

Forgiving is not a feeling - it is a deliberate choice of the heart. It does not make any sense as you try to reason out your self-interest. The circuit breaker for me was when I was convicted of harbouring a root of bitterness. I suffered a compound trauma when I lost my business, my house, my marriage and my children all within one year. Emotionally I had to disconnect all those issues. If I had been the perfect husband I suppose my wife would have had no reason to leave. So there were faults on both sides.

I assumed that if we paid our tithes regularly we would be shielded from financial hardship. It wasn't to be so. I assumed that if I delivered the best product I could engineer God would take care of the marketing for me. It wasn't to be so. I assumed that if we gave our children a Christian education they would not rebel against their parents. Sweet illusion...

If truly I am a survivor of chronic unemployment, divorce and homelessness then I have to behave in a way where those hardships do not block the love of Christ flowing out through me.

I suddenly realised my bitterness regarding the raw deal I got out of life betrayed my Christian witness. I promptly picked up the phone and announced to my daughter that I would attend her wedding, walk down the aisle with her and deliver a speech. What a watershed moment! It was not about my misguided feelings. No, it was all about my daughter's big day and I wanted to make sure I wasn't the one to spoil it.

Adrian McCabe says:
Thank you Bruno, what a great blog from the heart, and challenging to us to love without conditions. God bless, Adrian

Robert Walker says:
Bruno, thanks for being so open. Your story and decisions are very inspiring and encouraging for my walk with Jesus.

Peter DUNN says:
A great bit of sharing to go on your blog, Bruno. Thank you for passing it on. Yes, 2 Cor 1:3-7 confirms it, also 3 John 2. Love always in Jesus. Peter

Chris Harvey says:
This is great stuff. This story of yours was very personal and redemptive. If your can blog your journey as you have here, many will be encouraged



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Bruno Deshayes

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